This weekend was a very trying one. Last week, I had an incredible realization that brought peace to me on so many levels. Growing up, I had no idea what I wanted to be. A teacher was pretty much the most common answer to that incredibly premature question asked to kids of all ages. I say premature because shouldn’t a kid enjoy being a kid before they have to grow up? Stop asking that question until the kid starts looking at colleges junior year. I enjoyed the idea of being a teacher, partly to be a special mentor in someone’s life and partly because that meant I could decorate my classroom how I wanted, be super organized, and play with kids all day. It never morphed into an actual desire probably because my heart was never truly into it.
Since graduating high school I have felt behind. Everyone my age had flourishing college careers, internships, entry-level jobs in the field they went to school for. I know this is not typical and several people don’t end up using their degrees but it was hard to overlook that when it was so in your face (thanks Facebook). I was stuck. Until last week. I’ve been doing a lot of reading about other blogs and the women behind them, how they started, where they are now, and what a difference blogging has made in their lives. I felt a connection to them and their process that is undeniable.
This blog has been something kind of amazing for me personally and it has given me the creative outlet I’ve needed for a while. I’ve had several (and I mean since LiveJournal several) blogs and have never been able to find my niche. We are still super new and have a lot of growing to do (some of which will be coming soon!) but I feel amazing with the direction it’s going and really look forward to it’s possibilities.
This past weekend was a difficult one for me. My life hasn’t felt this chaotic, cluttered, and overwhelming without anything truly tangible to point my finger at in such a long time and I’m slooowwwly realizing that maybe it’s growing pains. Maybe my life is about to shift and land safely back on the right path. There’s nothing wrong with my life right now but it’s just at the point where everything feels so heavy and something has to give soon. I wanted to share my thoughts about our little blog and my rough weekend with you because it’s one of my happy places and it makes me feel lifted and inspired. So thank you, so much, for listening.